Zoom Silent Calls May Be Key To Maintain Friendship During Pandemic
It’s no secret that the pandemic has affected our friendship. Since the coronavirus landed on our shores nearly 12 months ago, we’ve had to swap dinner parties for quizzes at the Zoom Pub, after work drinks for sporadic phone calls and coffee dates for social distancing walks in the park – and that’s if we’re lucky. we live next to our friends.
A University College London study published last July found that in the first four months of the pandemic, 20% of Britons felt friendships with people outside of their household were affected, and one in five also said their relationships with housemates worsened. also began to decline.
Dr. Daisy Fancourt, professor of psychobiology and epidemiology at UCL, said at the time: This is especially true for people with diagnosed mental health problems and young people, as well as those with low family incomes, key workers, those who live near and those living with children, all of whom may face greater financial or psychological pressures, which were exacerbated during periods of isolation.
Beverly Blackman, a psychotherapist and member of the Counseling Directory, says that silence is often a sign that you are emotionally close to someone. These can be your close relatives, close friends, partners or housemates people with whom you have spent a lot of time and whose habits and moods you know and understand well, continues Blackman.
Silence can mean a lot, but it doesn’t always need to be filled out. Often times, keeping quiet with someone close to you feels relaxed, connected, and friendly, as if neither of you is under pressure to keep the conversation going because you are so comfortable together.
According to Blackman, the benefits of face-to-face interaction lie in sensation, the unconscious understanding of the other person and the feeling of what they are feeling. Without it, the dynamics of friendship can seem rather strange until we adapt to this different, virtual lifestyle.
Blackman adds that silent video calls are something she often encounters at work. For example, a long-distance couple called each other after work while they were preparing dinner, so the other person seemed to be in the room with them.
They chatted a bit while they cooked and ate, or fiddled around their apartments, and they watched the same movie together with a glass of wine for them it was a lifeline and kept the relationship alive and happy while they were so far from each other. adds Blackman.
I also had a client who was a writer and regularly used Zoom with a friend who was a writer; both of them were concentrating on their own work while they were on the call together, and they both found it motivating, supportive and friendly to know the other was there and a great job was done. Leaver says she loves the idea of Zoom’s silent ringing – and recently participated in it herself while watching a movie.
One of the best social interactions I’ve had since isolation was watching the worst movie of our time, Wild Mountain Thyme, at the same time as my friend Corey. Just knowing she was watching this and being able to take stock of Christopher Walken’s accent was so comforting and joyful. Plus, I had to hang out in my pajamas, which I really like, adds Leaver.
I highly recommend keeping a friend on Zoom while you are doing something else, like reading, cooking, or solving puzzles. Comfortable silence, gentle hanging, the reassuring feeling that someone is experiencing the same moment as you. Doing nothing with someone is actually surprisingly intimate; I really recommend this. Until we can lie back on each other’s sofas doing nothing in the same space, I think quiet zooms are a great idea.
If silent zooms really aren’t your cup of tea, there are many other ways to keep friendships during these weird times. Aside from voice memos, regular phone calls, and sending each other plain text packages to a friend telling you what you think about them, you can work wonders.